Diary
by AnnaSelene
Summary: Catherine reads Sara's notebook, but she did not find the answers that she was looking for. Sorry, I suck at summaries...Sara/Catherine with a hint of Grissom.... :-P


The Joy of PSPs and Condensed Milk

Diary

**Disclaimer:** I don't own CSI, I wish I did but alas, I don't

**Author's Note:** This is a Song Fic. Diary by Baby Face (or Bread). Catherine/Sara with a dash of Sara/Grissom……. femeslash…..Enjoy…. )

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**Catherine's POV:**

While we were waiting in the break room for Grissom to give out our assignments; I was thinking how it was great that Sara and I became friends. I mean, we used to bicker at one another but lately, we've been like the best of friends. But in a weird way, I sort of grew feelings for her. I watch her scribble something in one of her notebooks. A few minutes later, Grissom came in to bring us our cases for the shift. So basically, Nick and Greg were in a case so as Sara and I. On the other hand Warrick gets to be solo. I didn't feel jealous because Sara and I are paired and that's the way I like it.

"Hey Sara, come on. We have to get to the scene already and I'm driving." I called out.

"Yeah, I'm coming." She said and followed me to the door bringing her notebook with her.

_**I found her diary underneath a tree.  
And started reading about me  
The words she's written took me by surprise  
You'd never read them in her eyes.  
They said that she had found the love she waited for.  
Wouldn't you know it, she wouldn't show it. **_

On the way to the scene, we were both quiet. Not saying anything. When we finally arrived it was somewhere near the woods. They said that hunters found the body here. So we processed the scene and headed out back to the lab. But as I was about to start the car Sara said that she forgot something in the scene so I waited in the car instead. Then I saw the notebook that she writing on a few minutes ago. When I opened the notebook, here's what I've read…

_I think I'm in love. I can't believe that after much waiting, I could never think that I could love again. I mean, after all this pain, I really never thought that I would find love again…_

I suddenly stopped reading because I saw Sara coming.

"Hey, what took you so long?" I asked with a smirk.

"Sorry. Hey, I see that you're reading my notebook." She said giving me her gap tooth grin.

"Sorry, I didn't mean to. I was just curious on what you're writing. That's all. I just want to ask, am I the one you're describing?" I asked in almost a whisper.

"No Cath. I'm sorry. But, its not you. I swear." Sara said giving me a small smile.

"Alright, whatever you say." I said as I started the Denali to head back to the lab.

_**When she confronted with the writing there,  
Simply pretended not to care.  
I passed it off as just in keeping with  
Her total disconcerting air  
And though she tried to hide  
The love that she denied,  
Wouldn't you know it, she wouldn't show it.  
And as I go through my life, I will give to her my wife  
All the sweet things that I can find.  
**_

Weeks went by and she acted as nothing happened. That it was all our figment of our imagination. So we went on with our lives.

But about a month later she asked me to get another pen refill in her bag in the locker since the lab techs are short today; she has a whole lot of things to run in the lab. So I went to her locker to look for the pen refill when I came across the same notebook that I've read about a month ago. Then I read on further and finally understood what Sara meant that it was not me. Here's what it said…

_I think I'm in love. I can't believe that after much waiting, I could never think that I could love again. I mean, after all this pain, I really never thought that I would find love again. Who would think that Grissom would be mine, to think he proposed lately to show his love for me. I really love him. I wish we will last forever…_

"_I couldn't believe this. Grissom and Sara?! But, that means that Sara and I can never be together. Tears started to fall in my eyes. How could I be so blind? And I call myself an investigator? This is not right!"_ I thought.

I returned the notebook composed myself so that the tears are not obvious and got the refill, I gave it to Greg to give it to Sara and told him that if Sara asks why I didn't give it myself, that I forgot something important at home.

_**I found her diary underneath a tree.  
And started reading about me.  
The words began stick and tears to flow.  
Her meaning now was clear to see.  
The love she'd waited for was someone else not me  
Wouldn't you know it, she wouldn't show it.  
**_

When I got home, I took a very long shower, crying. Then I called Grissom up and told him that I can't come in for the next shift. Grissom agreed. It was a good thing that Lindsay was with my sister, Nancy. I ended up crying all day in my bed. I cried myself to sleep that day.

_**And as I go through my life, I will wish for her his wife  
All the sweet things that she can find  
All the sweet things they can find**_

When I woke up, I felt that I sort of had nothing else to do but to move on from the situation at hand and most probably wish them all the best in this world.

End.

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**AN**: Hope that you enjoyed it even though it's kind of depressing in Catherine's part. Reviews are very much appreciated. )


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